The Merry Merry Month of May

May brings warm weather and warm memories. The ground warms up and soil is prepared for seeds and plants. Flowers bloom, grass is green, and the trees wear a full coat of leaves.

It is a month of BEGINNINGS.

We welcomed our first grandchild into the world in the month of May. She has had 20 years of birthday celebrations now. (Seems unbelievable!)

I love this 4 generation photo – my mom, our son, his daughter, and me.

It is the month of ENDINGS and TRANSITIONS.

Where we live, May signals the end of the school year. Life becomes very busy with the year-end activities, promotions, and graduations. There are bittersweet moments as seniors graduate from High Schools and Colleges to transition to their next endeavors.

It is a month of CELEBRATIONS.

My mom’s birthday was celebrated yearly on May 10, and it was in May 2012 that we had her celebration of life funeral service just one week shy of her 91^st birthday. We siblings pulled “The Haken Trio” back together for the one and only time in decades so we could sing at Mom’s funeral.

May is the month where honor and appreciation are shown in special ways to the women who brought us into the world, as we remember our mothers each Mothers’ Day.

But what if our mothers are gone and the grief is fresh? Or what if one is estranged from her mother? What if you long to be a mother but that has not happened for you? What if even the thought of Mothers’ Day makes you sad and you can find no reason to celebrate?

Maybe it would help to consider and remember older women who have influenced you in positive ways during your lifetime, perhaps in one or more of the following ways:

• ‘Taking you under her wing’ when you needed someone.

• Encouraging you to hone the talents and skill that you are now proficient in, by giving you opportunities to exercise those talents and abilities.

• Giving you spiritual encouragement that led you to faith in Christ and helped you grow.

• Teaching you practical things that have now become second nature to you.

• Walking with you through a crisis, or two, or three, or …

• Remembering you on days that are of special importance to you.

• Praying with you and for you.

Older women in my life have ministered to me in all the above-mentioned ways, and I am thankful for each one. Many are gone now, but memories of them warm my heart,

This Mothers’ Day, let’s honor with thankful hearts:

• The mother who gave us life and brought us into the world, whether she raised us or not. No matter the circumstances, we are alive despite her having other options.

• The older women who stepped into the mother role in our lives when perhaps our birth mothers could not.

And let’s thank God for the strength He gives us to carry on. (Philippians 4:13)

Happy Mothers’ Day!

This one’s for you, Mom. Pete and I loved having you living here with us.

Blessings,

Ruth

LOVE

My husband and I were privileged to care for both of our mothers as they completed life’s journeys. Although at separate times, and in different circumstances, there were similarities. One of our mothers had dementia, and one had problems of a different kind. Each situation brought joys and sorrows, frustrations and fears, questions and doubts. And, given the chance, we would do it all over again.

In each case we wanted to live out the Scriptural principle: “Honor thy father and thy mother,” but sometimes it was hard to know what was most honoring. We wanted to show our love for them in demonstrable and practical ways, but again, what was most loving? Love given is not always love received.

Perhaps as you have tried to love others, you have encountered resistance which has surprised you because you, to the best of your ability, were acting in love. If we want to follow the example of the greatest teacher who ever walked on the face of the earth, we will love – even when it is hard – even when it is not well received or reciprocated – even when is it inconvenient.

Jesus said it this way: “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another” John 13:34-35 (NIV).  And He loved … all the way to the cross … laying down His life. So, when love makes demands on our time, our schedule, our plans, our desires … if we are misunderstood, rebuffed, or criticized, we must love. Because ultimately, we do it for Him, the One who knows us best and loves us most.

Love,

Ruth

If you are interested in reading about my caregiving experience as my mother completed her journey, my book, Bringing Mother Home, is available now on Amazon. You can find a link to it on my book page.

Changing Seasons

I have a certain fascination with Fall leaves. I love to see the brilliance of the reds, yellows, and oranges (especially the reds!). I don’t know why, unless it’s because we lived so many years overseas in a country without the four seasons. Or maybe it’s just the nostalgia of my childhood growing up at the foot of the Blue Mountains in Pennsylvania. Looking out the big picture window in our dining room at the mountain, I could see the trees go through the changes of each season.

On a recent walk with my friend, Linda, I stopped to pick up this leaf from the sidewalk. It intrigued me because of the parts that were still green. Maybe, like me, it wasn’t ready to give up summer quite yet. But seasons come and seasons go, and change happens. It happens in the lives of all of us, doesn’t it? It is certainly happening in the world around us!

Perhaps you are going through a season of change in your own life. Maybe it’s a work situation, where you are wondering how much longer your job will continue, or even if you want to continue in it. Maybe your children are growing up – Way … Too … Fast – and you feel like your role in their lives is losing influence. Maybe you feel uncertain if you’ve done enough to prepare them for the next stage. Maybe you’re tired. You’ve worked hard and there’s still so much that needs doing, but you have less energy than you used to have, and life has become more complicated.

Whatever it is, this is a SEASON … a season where change can still be beautiful!

Charles H. Spurgeon said, “The seasons change, and you change, but the Lord abides evermore the same, and the streams of His love are as deep, as broad, and as full as ever.“

“To everything there is a season, a time for every purpose under heaven.” Ecclesiastes 3:1 (NKJV)

In whatever season you find yourself, His love is deep and broad and full.

Blessings,

Ruth